crib training your co-sleeping baby
Thursday, March 02, 2017we transitioned Sky from co-sleeping to the crib at about 6 months. since birth, she slept in bed with us, she was breastfed and we swaddled every night. we loved the time of bond. she was feeding normally throughout the night until she turned about 5 months old. she grew up so fast and was very independent, she started waking almost every hour to nurse, and because she was so advanced, she could latch on by herself until she fell back asleep. the waking continued for weeks, and wasn't regressing. she was nursing so much at night, I wasn't pumping much milk during my working hours. and then I started to notice she would wiggle a lot while feeding at nights and she seemed frustrated.
by this time she was drinking 8 ounces at a time and I couldn't pump more than 5 ounces no matter how long I tried, so I knew she was waking that much because she wasn't getting enough. it was such a hard decision for me to make, trust me, tears were shed. but I decided to cut her off for her sake and mine.
we strictly started to formula feed her at 6 months since she was holding her own bottle as well as eating solids by now. and this was a HUGE part of the transition for us. so the journey began. it was so hard to even think about not cuddling with her all night, but we knew it was for the best. the first night we tried, it was a success. so easy and not very many tears were shed. and then.. after a few nights, it had gotten hard. she wasn't happy to be in her bed all alone. like any baby would be after co-sleeping all their life. I mean, duh!
once you make the decision, C O M M I T! it's so important. you have to be all in, because it won't be easy, like we had thought it was that first night. it usually takes about 3-4 days to break the habit. don't torture them for 2 days and give in the third because it feels easier. often, that last or last days are the game changers. this is when you see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I tried to simplify the days for you as they happened.
D A Y - O N E
here we go, I knew this was not going to be easy, but it couldn't get any worst right?
first things first. we decided on the time we were going to make her bed time, because she was on no type of schedule. we started the night off with a nice bathe to keep her awake as long as we could. I wanted her to be really tired to make it easier. we made her a bottle, laid her down with a stuffed animal to help support the bottle and a blankie. I patted her back/bum with a good firm pat for a about 2 minutes. she fell asleep and I snuck out.
she doesn't have a night light in her room and we didn't use any music or white noise. I have read many articles on healthy sleeping habits for babies and these two were the most important.
she's naturally a good sleeper, so we didn't hear from her until about 2am. she was up with a roar! I didn't ever take her out of the crib into my arms. I checked her diaper quickly and made sure she still had something in her bottle. I repositioned her with the bottle, lamby and the blankie. I patted for about 1 minute and walked out. she was mad! this was the hard part. I couldn't stand to hear her cry and it was so hard to not walk in and hold her in my arms. I waited outside of the door for about a minute, that's as long as my heart would let me go. and I walked back in and padded her again and we repeated the process about 4/5 times before she fell back asleep.
3am...4am....6am...all on repeat. padding, leaving and padding and leaving. I refilled her bottle once and padded and left. all until 7am came around.
D A Y - T W O
I'm a working mama, so I couldn't nap during the day to prepare for our second night. I was already exhausted from the night before. Brandon and I discussed the first night so he knew how to help this night. we planned on taking turns.
again, we tired her out and put her in bed at bedtime. bottle, lamby, blankie. she wasn't going right away so we let her cry it out for a few mins. its so hard for both of us. we waited longer and longer after each time we went in not exceeding 5 mins long. you need to know what that magic number is for your family. some people, like us, can only do it for 5 mins, some families can go hours. everybody is different. I know, we're softies, but that was what we decided.
we repeated the process all night until morning came. she was up less times than the night before so it felt like progress was being made.
D A Y - T H R E E
Brandon put her down with the same routine except the padding, and she was out within seconds. it was so easy we couldn't believe it. did our plan really work? it was so hard to believe.
she only woke up once all night. I refilled her bottle and she went right back down. easy peesy. she slept until morning.
til this day, she sleeps in her crib every night. same time everyday, 7:30. she tells us herself when she is ready, so we will make her a bottle and lay her right down. we wont hear a peep out of her unless she wants a refill at night and she will go right back down. at bedtime she is so used to being in the crib that she doesn't ask to be cuddled or rocked, she will not let us do that, she just wants straight into bed. heartbreaking at times, but I rocked Noah to bed everyday until he was about 2 years old and we don't want to repeat that. we get cuddles from her when she is sick or nap times.
T I P S
once you decide to transition, commit to it! it may be easier for all the working parents to begin the journey on a weekend as the lack of sleep does weight on you.
be aware of the season. we transitioned Sky during late fall, so we always made sure she was in warm pajamas. sleep sacks are great too.
pick your bed time wisely and protect that time. decide on something reasonable for your family. treat it like an apt, nothing can interfere with that time because babies needs a schedules.
make sure you are using a good firm pat.
gradually increase the time before you walk to reposition your baby. they need to slowly learn to self soothe.
don't use a nightlight as it can be a reason your baby has a hard time sleeping. white and blue based lights, however dim, will inhibit the secretion of the sleep inducing hormone melatonin at night. melatonin is released by the brain in response to light sensitivity in the eyes.
if you opt on the CIO (cry it out) method, it's probably best to keep it to yourself. this is a subject that comes with the biggest opinions and some can be harsh. you know what works for your family better than anyone else, trust your decision without needing others opinions.
if it is difficult for you as you wait the time allotted before you walk in to put baby back down, try things that will help you keep track of time. use headphones and your phone to listen to A SONG before walking in each time.
DO NOT place a blankie or stuffed animal or anything for that matter in the crib before your baby is at least 6 months old or until your baby is very mobile and strong. these will increase SIDS if your baby cannot effectively reposition to comfort on their own.
once you have established your schedule, be careful about naps too late in the day.
sleeping on their back. its advised for baby to sleep on his/her back until they turn about 6 months old. just for safety reasons.
everything you do in reaction to your baby crying when you are trying to get them back to sleep is going to be setting a pattern for them. it's easy to get frustrated and tired and pick them up, but what is happening is that the baby is learning to get that reaction out of you and that's going to be an even harder habit to break.
people feel differently about putting your baby to bed with a bottle. the reason we did it was because she could hold her own bottle and remove it when done. consult your pediatrician on what is best for your baby and their age.
*as you can see in the below picture, she moved the bottle away from her mouth when done. (above her head)
no biggie
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