10.17.16

our weekends have been so busy lately. parties, guests, events, sick days.. we are still trying to recover.
it's amazing how easily our energy level can be zapped. we spent every moment together as a family with only interruptions to take naps here and there.

I've been having a lot of alone time with the kids lately. Brandon has Fire Academy on Thursdays and Tailgates on Fridays. then he had a Buddy Walk Saturday morning. with the fire station, he went in support of the 12th Annual Down Syndrome Foundation Buddy Walk. its an event where they raise awareness and fundraise for the Down Syndrome Foundation. I'm so proud of him for stepping up and serving. if you know Brandon, you know he has a heart to serve. I admire that so much.

it was an early morning for me. (Brandon usually lets me sleep in on the weekends) but Sky is an early bird so I was up. we played, ate, played, bathed, ate and napped. she wont nap more than once a day, and its only for about 30-40 mins. it kills me! by the end of the day, we are all zonked!

Noah was obsessed with going to the park, so we told him we would. we stopped at a few shops before and Noah didn't let us forget that we were not following the plan. every place we went, "lets get ice cream and go to park." after about the 15th time we thought we'd better follow through.
fine Noah, FINE.

isn't his face just great?

Sky has been crawling for a while now, so now we are trying to get her to walk. she knows the movements, but she is still very unbalanced.

you can get a glimpse of what eating with us looks like.
not always, but often, we deal with a stage 3 clinging toddler or stage 1,000 wild baby.
our life is not always put together, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
hope your weekend was as fun as ours.

10.03.16

we kicked off Friday evening with some mommy time for both the babes.
Brandon had his tailgate event per usual, and I usually try to hang out with someone this day since its just the kids and I, but I just wanted to stay in and relax. I know I was taking a long shot considering the fact that I was sleep deprived from staying up with Noah all night since he had been sick for the last half of the week (fever of 102/103) and Sky had been getting a little fussy lately as well. everyone in the house was sick except for Sky, thank you breastfeeding!

the kids were not good for me, they were GREAT!
Brandon still hasn't seen this in the flesh, but they were just on their best behavior. both of them. this day Noah was such a servant, to both his sister and I. he really interacted with her in a way that he hasn't done yet. since they were being so good, I turned into a cleaning maniac! I left them in the family room to play and Noah did just that. he played with her. and if she started fussing, he came and found me to let me know she was crying and wouldn't leave my side until I went with him to check on sister.
he just wanted to see her happy.
he made it his mission to make her laugh.
he wanted to play cars with her.
he wanted to watch tv with her.
he found her bottle on the kitchen counter and sat to feed her.
he brought her toys.
he wanted to say his prayers with her.

"Hold my hand big brother all the years through, Hold my hand little sister, for I will always love and protect you."

they both went down so early, I got some mommy time. a soft pretzel and Baby Daddy.

SATURDAY
rough night for all of us. so we for sure slept in and cuddled all morning.
I don't know what's in the air, but we were having nose and throat issues.
we did get a surprise in the mail first thing, and that was Sky's walker. I had just ordered it on Thursday. I think Noah liked it more than Sky and of course I liked it more than Noah. I decided to go with the Joovy Spoon and I am very happy with my decision. the design, the colors, the sturdiness, the large tray, everything. match made in heaven. these things are usually pretty ugly.
Noah is having so much fun pushing Sky around, and she's not complainin'. he pushes her here, he pushes her there. its extremely cute.
the kids were so over being cooped up in the house that we decided to go to.. of course. Target. we needed a few things, and we also wanted to start seeing what toys Noah liked in preparation for Christmas.
**I have been making Christmas lists for the kids on Pinterest.
You can find Noah list here.
and Sky's list here.



SUNDAY
as soon as we were all up, it was time for some throat soothing tea.
Brandon had a really rough night, and Noah and I did so much better with sleep. so our plan for this day was to do absolutely nothing.
we skipped church, cant remember the last time we did that, and just hung out until it was lunch time. it was my mom's birthday, so we were excited for that. and Noah was dying to give her the present. Cowboy Café is now open on Sunday's so that was a no brainer. most of us had the chicken fried steak, and Sky ate gravy.
we took some naps, and it was right back up to playing. I did my gels this time, we did like 2 weeks worth of laundry and tired to keep the kids calm. they were some kind of crazy! Noah wanted only to play and Sky was super fussy, we think it may be teeth.
we took it super easy. Noah and I danced in mid light to TSwifts Everything Has Changed. we are all Swifties and proud.



hope everyone had a good weekend. don't forget to take your vitamin C.

09.23.16

my firstborn, my miracle, my first love.

I have been feeling in a rut lately. I have been a little sad lately. I have been remembering things lately. I'm not sure what has come over me, but I'm fighting with myself and the feelings.
it's so hard to explain, my heart, my emotions.
but in the last couple of weeks, I have been remembering. I remember who I used to be, what I used to look like. I remember what my life was. and I cant help but smile as I look back. I smile at the life I live.
it's incredible to think of what I've been through and what I have. when I think about it, I realize.. I have it all!
through these thoughts of the past, I have been looking at old pictures of my first baby. my firstborn, the one who made me a mom. and when I look at those pictures, I cry. it's a happy cry, but also a sad cry.

time. like I've said once before, it's a bully. and I'm missing those times when Noah was the only thing I had. Noah was my fist-mate. he was my best friend. he showed me joy everyday. Noah didn't see my past, my faults, my mistakes. he saw my heart. and in my heart, was love. love for a little human that I never thought existed. a kind of love that can heal, inspire.. the kind of love that I want forever.
as I look back and remember us, it was love. love that inspired me to be the women he would someday be proud of. a women of purpose. a mom to a king.

I wrote Noah once again another letter. (I express myself better through writing, just ask Brandon.) I want to share this letter with you all. not just to share, but with the purpose that hopefully, us moms, will stop time once in a while. so that we can see, and see without the veil of our daily life, routines and schedules.

we are so very blessed! to have created life within us. and after 9 months, to hold that someone in your arms that sees you, and sees love. its a miracle. don't let time rob you of what once was, is, and is yet to come. but be in the moment, every time. because it will only last a second, and it will soon become a memory. the time is now. the time is present. and the time is perfect.
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To the One Who Made Me A Mom,

I cried a lot when I was pregnant with you. I was unsure I was fit to be your mom. I was scared I wouldn't be enough. But I was also excited, excited that God would trust me with his creation. He picked me, and I'm honored. I thought about you everyday. I thought of what you would look like and what your future might hold, and I prayed for you every day while you were in my belly. And although I was still uncertain of things, God told me, "He is not just for you, but he is coming to be light to others." I then knew, there is a king coming. And he is within me. You have a great purpose. Therefore, every believer fulfills the prophetic, priestly, and kingly roles for which our Savior has been anointed. In a sense, we are all prophets called to proclaim God’s Word, priests ordained to offer ourselves as sacrifices, and kings enthroned to war against the Lord’s enemies and help expand His kingdom. (Matt 28:18–20; Rom 12:1–2; Rev 17:1–14).

The day you came into the world was the day that changed my life forever. You made me a mom. It wasn’t all butterflies and roses at first. It took me a while to fully understand what had taken place. It was the biggest, most life altering event I had ever experienced. But oh how lucky I am to have experienced something so great, something so great that I never even knew existed. Something I never even knew I needed. That’s the thing about God. He always gives us what we need. It’s not about wants. What a miraculous gift giver He is. I am humbled to be your mama, and I’ve prayed for you and over you every day since the day you were born.

My little love, I have loved every moment with you, but it has been painful and exciting to see the time pass and to see you grow into the beautiful person you’re meant to be. Painful because I want to freeze time and memorize your speech, your tiny fingers, and tiny toes. I want to remember your funny faces, your laugh, and your love for life. Painful because I want the moments of you crying out for me to last forever but painful because never do I wish to see you hurt. Painful because I know this time is too precious. I want time to slow down so that we can hold on to these cherished days forever. But it’s also been exciting, too. Exciting to see you roll over, sit up, then stand. Exciting to see you talk, walk, then run. Exciting to see you go off to school and make friends. Exciting to see you eat ice cream and love baseball with dad. Exciting to see you want to read and learn and play and love. I pray for your future and I pray for God to give me the strength I need to let you go and grow.

It won’t be just the two of us (or the four of us counting daddy and Sky) like it has been for very much longer. But I want you to know something. God knew I needed you first to help mold me into the mommy I always needed to be. You did that. From the sleepless nights you gave me when you were just an infant to the times I couldn’t take my eyes off of you when you finally closed your eyes. From the time when I first heard your little laugh to the time when we were both meeting dad for the first times. From the time when you were inconsolable and I had no idea what I was doing to the time when only mommy could make it all better. I have loved you deeper than the depths of the ocean. I have prayed more than I ever even knew how to pray. You did that.

Being a mom to you has been the greatest joy of my life. Know that I will love you forever, be there for you always, and always hold onto you with all my might. There might be times when I can’t physically hold you but know that Jesus can.

No matter how our world changes, you will always be my first. We’ll love another together, and we’ll grow together, and I’m excited to see what the future holds. You’ll grow up one day, and I’ll have to let you go spread your wings just like God always intended. Until then, I hope the days slow down a bit, but if they don’t, I’ll never forget that you were the one who made me a mommy.


I love you with all my heart and soul,

Mommy
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because I am remembering Noah as a young buck, I have gathered my all time favorite pictures of him for you. many of you may of not even known us this far back, but let me tell you.. he was as charming then as he is now.

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